Paired with any size-medium frat tank, wearing a boonie to the beach sends just enough "sup girl" vibes to take things from the swim up bar to the Bellagio bedroom with no performance enhancers. That means you don't have to worry about taking too many jello shots with a bunch of Ritalin-fiending randos at the 2nd annual Alpha Phi spring break beach-a-palooza. 

The prince of the pooper needs his totem tokus, and wearing any bucket hat sends the message that you're not here for business, you're here to send it straight to the rear.