The next best thing to the beach is the bowling alley. It's a place of serenity, a calming crashing of pins (much like that of waves) that soothes the soul, with alcoholics everywhere, and this button-down that looks like it belongs in no other place than the bowling alley or on a 65-year-old man at the beach.
P.S. This button-down pairs well with a 10' Hobie, a dong sarong, and a tan that makes you look like a leatherback.
